Working your way through bereavement
Losing someone results in a feeling of grief, which is a perfectly natural response. Everyone experiences grief in different ways. What you need to do is ensure you give yourself time to work through your grief as long as it takes. There is no fast cure, or preventative measure. It is simply a process you need to allow for.
Grief is unique to each person, but it will happen to each and every person in different ways. However there are some aspects to grief that are universal, and we talk about those here.
This is the first stages of grief that occurs as soon as the bereavement is felt. It can be intense, inconsolable and many different mental and physical symptoms can occur. There can be a detached feeling, where the person doesn’t feel like anything is ‘real’, and they are experiencing a dreamlike state. Other times the grief can be far too real, in that the pain is too much to cope with.
Integrated grief can be the next stage, where the loss of the loved one is incorporated into daily life, where new routines are made and feelings forged. A life lived without the person becomes possible – things seem easier to cope with, and the bereaved finds life a little more endurable than before. It doesn’t mean they feel any less sad, or their grief is diminished. It is simply another step towards coping with their bereavement.
Sometimes what can be seen as a healthy way of dealing with bereavement can be interrupted. This is known as complicated grief, whereby healing does not occur as it should. It is as though life has stopped for the bereaved, and they are unable to move on or accept their loss. This is when grief becomes unnatural, and getting outside help is a good idea.
Absence of grief
Sometimes people do not feel grief. Instead they feel relieved, for example, after watching someone struggle through a long illness, or suffer with immense pain. Death can sometimes be a good thing in these cases.
If you feel your grief has become difficult to manage, and you are having trouble coping with your loss, contact Cheryl King Counselling for bereavement counselling in Preston. They are specialists in helping you move through your grief to a brighter future.